What Is Narcissism? | Who is a Narcissist?| How to deal with a Narcissist | How to get rid a Narcissist |#narcissist #abuse #narcissisticabuse
What Is Narcissism? Narcissism is extreme self-involvement to the point where a person ignores the needs of those around them. While anyone may have narcissistic behavior once in a while, true narcissists often disregard others or their feelings. They don’t understand the effect their behavior Are you In a Relationship With a Narcissist? 1. You don't know what they want 2.You feel inferior to them 3. You question your reality 4. You always apologize to them In relationships, a narcissistic individual can be: ▸ Highly demanding ▸ Charming, but only for self-centered reasons ▸ Ruthless when they feel slighted or disrespected ▸ Controlling and jealous-even possessive ▸ Disinterested in a partner's personal life or interests ► Prone to using gaslighting tactics or behaving abusively toward partners How to Manage a Narcissistic Relationship 1. Learn everything about narcissism. 2. Have realistic expectation 3. Detach, don't react, and avoid confict. 4. Identify and confront abuse. 5. Set boundaries. 6. Use systematic transactional communication. Narcissistic Abuse Cycle 1. Idealization Referred to as the honeymoon stage. The narcissist puts you on a pedestal and makes you feel special. They love bomb, make grand gestures, give elaborate gifts, and shower you in affection. 2. Devaluation The narcissist removes you from the pedestal and puts you down. Criticism, insults, controlling behavior, gaslighting, and even physical abuse are just some of the weapons of the narcissist. You feel worthless. 3. Rejection The narcissist discards you. They're less interested in love and security than on feeding their ego. They play the victim and blame you for the relationship's failure choosing therapy 4. Hoovering The narcissist retains a sense of power and control by sucking up all your time and attention. They conduct smear campaigns, run into you "by accident," and make you slew of bold promises. You feel forced to engage with them. QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF TO IDENTIFY A POTENTIAL NARCISSIST 1. Do they have trouble saying they are sorry or do they take accountability? 2. Are they consistently kind or do they go back and forth from being nice to being cruel or unkind? 3. Do they communicate to be understood and to understand, or are they focused on winning arguments, being right, or getting their way? 4. Do they respect your boundaries or do they ignore them, walk all over them and/or are offended by them? 5. Do they care how their behavior affects you? 6. Do they constantly see themselves as the victims? 7. Do they validate you, do you feel seen and heard? And do they make you feel like your feelings are important too? 8. Do they consider your feelings There is so much Loss when you Dealing With Narcissistic Abuse People wonder why it is so difficult to get over a relationship with a narcissist. There is so much loss. You lose yourself, you lose your connection with friends and family, you could lose your house, finances, health, mental stability and so much more. You don't just lose a relationship in these situations, Sometimes it feels like you lost everything. So to those people who do not understand why it's taking you so long to recover from this, believe me, I don't care who you are, this is not an easy hurdle for anyone. Narcissistic abuse survivors are warriors. Some Things Narcissists Don't want You To know 1- They need you more than you need them, that is why many times they need to find a new supply in order to leave the relationship. 2- They are jealous and envious of anyone who has more than them, even you. 3-They do nothing unless they get something back. There is always an agenda to their generosity. 4-They gain information about you so they could use it against you later. 5-They think if you tolerated their bad behavior you deserved everything they did to you. 6-The more vulnerable you feel the more powerful they feel in the relationship. 7-They are extremely vindictive and will make you pay for any slight they perceive in the relationship. Wether they verbally abuse you, or they find a way to punish you. Signs you may be suffering From Narcissistic Abuse 1. You feel mentally, emotionally, and Physically exhausted. You are constantly on high alert, or feel like you are always walking on egg shells. 2. You feel like you lost yourself, and no longer know who you are. You feel isolated and lonely. 3. You are suffering from low self esteem and you never feel good enough, or you may feel like there is something wrong with you. 4. You are in a constant state of confusion and life feels overwhelming, and you often feel like you don't know what you are doing? Suffer from depression /or anxiety. 5. You are having trouble being functional, and accomplishing everyday tasks. 6. Your entire wellbeing is suffering and you are getting physical symptoms like headaches, or other physical problems and/or illnesses as a result of the chronic stress in these relationships.
WHY NO RESPONSE IS THE BEST RESPONSE WHEN YOU ARE DEALING WITH A NARCISSIST
It doesn't matter whether your response is negative or positive. A narcissist will distort anything that's being said or done anyway. The fact that they could trigger you makes them feel powerful and in control.
Actual victim/survivors of narcissistic abuse share their experiences seeking validation, support, and justice.
Their motivation is to raise awareness, protect others, and heal from trauma, driven by a quest for truth and justice rather than a desire for control or validation.
7. You feel beaten down and broken as a result of the relationship with the narcissist or pathological person.
Not to get a response can be torturous for a narcissist. It makes them feel empty, lost and out of control.
It even can make them feel desperate because the supply you give them validates their entire existence. Without you they feel lost that's why not responding to them and sticking to the "no contact rule"is the best revenge.
Closure For Survivors Of Narcissistic Abuse
Please do not let these things keep you stuck. You can move forward knowing you are not crazy the narcissist gaslighted, manipulated and intentionally made you feel that way. You are not stupid.
You are not born knowing people like this exist, nor are you born with the knowledge, and manipulatory tactics of pathological people. Narcissists purposely devalue you to make you feel unworthy and not good enough.
This is a lie they use to manipulate and control you. You are a beautiful soul, you are more than worthy and always were. Pathological people are the least qualified to define you or determine your worth. Don't let them gaslight you into thinking they are the victims and you are the one responsible
for the problems or failures in the relationship. Narcissists purposely blame everyone else even when they are clearly and unequivocally responsible for something and even with proof of their guilt in front of them, they still will refuse to take accountability and will blame someone else.
People are who they are, they are not going to miraculously become an amazing partner to the next person. People and especially narcissists who don't even admit they need changing will not become the loving partner you hoped they would be for you.
Human nature does not work that way. Their pathology does not just go away. Sadly, they will continue to victimize other people.
How To Starve A Narcissist
1. No Contact
2. Limited Contact
3. Emotionally Detached Contact Few Words
4. Communicate through text or email only (unless emergency) Limited Emotion
5. You want to appear almost invisible, with little to no available
Narcissists Are Jealous Of You
narcissists have a very hard time with envy. Their ego will not let them accept that emotion. It is too shameful for them, so they turn their envy into contempt.
They want to destroy everything that is both beautiful and good about you
How to leave a narcissist
1. Acknowledge the Problem
2. Develop a Support Network
3. Plan a Safe Exit Strategy
4. Set Boundaries
5. Keep a record or documenting abusive behavior or threats
6. Seek Legal Assistance
7. Stay Calm and Focused
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